Monday, May 05, 2008

Crash

Today, I hit a point where I simply needed to crash. I usually describe myself as an outgoing introvert. That basically means I enjoy being with people, but get re energized by being alone. And having had lots and lots and lots of meetings with many people in the past month has been amazing, and hard. I absolutely love telling the stories of what's happening in Kenya. I cannot tell those stories without getting emotionally involved. And so it takes a bit more of me.

So, if I've been running into any individuals during recharge-needed moments (point in case: this morning at church, or Jeremiah's graduation party this afternoon), pole sana. (That is, sorry!)

I realized I wasn't able to engage in conversation the way I wanted and needed to, and was very thankful for the fact that I was at the Clarks' home where I feel comfortable enough to withdraw. And while the party started winding down, I headed out the door to go and share at a dinner in Alta Loma.

What a neat event that was! The hostess is someone who's been in contact with me through e-mail and my blog for some years now. She and her husband have even been to our villages, but always at times when I've not been around. Tonight, I finally got to meet their family . . . plus about 15 friends!

What an honor to sit and share with a room full of people - none of whom I actually know - about the work God is doing in Kenya.

Tomorrow, I get to do it again. At 2 pm, I'll be sharing at the Upland Library, followed by a reception at our office, then three meetings in the evening. Tuesday morning, I'll share at ORTV and have some down time to work on a newsletter before three more meetings. On Wednesday, I leave for the Midwest again.

It has been really, really good to see old friends, to make new friends, and to boast about the work God is doing and we get to be a part of in Kenya.

In between things, though, as I drive down beautiful roads like Sierra Madre in Azusa and look at the incredible homes, or when I simply drive down the highway or walk in a store and look at the abundance by which we're surrounded in this culture, I am stunned, sometimes plain overwhelmed by it all.

And I think of Jesus' words in Luke 12, "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked."

I could never, ever out-give God. Not even of my time or of my energy. But as this introvert is beginning to feel the pain of pouring into this culture and its people, I need Him to fill me up.

Mother Teresa once said, "How sad would it be if you spent time with your neighbor and gave him only of yourself." If I am to give people more than just me, I desperately need to sit at God's feet so he can fill me up to overflowing.

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